If how to stop judging yourself is a question that you’re looking for answers for, you are certainly at the right place.
We are all guilty of judging ourselves at some point or the other. It could be because of a low self-esteem, having too many expectations that often aren’t fulfilled or due to any other reason.
If you find yourself having these thoughts constantly, you are definitely a victim of self-judgement.
- I am so dumb to not have aced the interview.
- I am too underqualified to ever have my dream job.
- My friend didn’t call me because I know I am boring.
- I do not deserve to be treated with respect or love.
- I am not smart like my other friends/ family.
And the list goes on and on. While this is pretty common and normal to a certain extent, is it actually good for you? Well, definitely not!
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Once you start having these thoughts, it tends to become a habit. And if this ends up becoming a habit, it could prove toxic to your own health. It can become hard to break these barriers of your own mind and live in peace or find happiness. Not just that, it can also make you feel horrible about yourself.
Although difficult, it is definitely not impossible to stop judging yourself. Wondering how? Then keep reading as we share some real tips, tricks and advice with you.
A Practical Guide on How to Stop Judging Yourself
1. Self Assessment
Before finding out what you can do to stop this habit of self depreciation, self assessment is a very important step. Here is how you can self assess.
- Pay attention to your thoughts
The first step towards stopping self-judgement would be by paying attention to your thoughts. Sometimes the habit of judging self becomes so automated that your mind doesn’t even realize that it’s happening.
You need to break this chain by trying to notice these feelings of judgment whenever they come up in your mind. Become more conscious of what your thoughts are and it will take you in the right direction.
While it may seem a little difficult at first, you need to keep trying until you are completely aware of what your thoughts are. It will make you think, realize and then reflect.
- Determine where these judgements are coming from
Our next tip on how to stop judging yourself would be to determine where your judgements are coming from. Is there a particular emotion or situation triggering these judgements or is there another deeply rooted issue?
It will help you realize whether you have just one issue causing this or whether you have just developed this mean habit. Also determine how often you have these thoughts of judgement.
- Ask yourself ‘why’
Now, ask yourself the reason behind your self judgements. Is it coming from your lack of confidence or self-esteem? Or is it because you find others around you doing better than you? Or is it simply because you expected better of yourself but couldn’t live up to those expectations?
2. How to Stop Judging Yourself?
By doing the above two steps, you probably have a better idea of how and why you are judging yourself. Let us now take a look at how to eradicate it.
- Learn to appreciate yourself
Yes, you may be flawed but who isn’t? Instead of knocking yourself down for everything that you aren’t or can’t be, start appreciating yourself for what you are.
Learn to notice the good little things about yourself and appreciate yourself enough. Start every morning with a happy and positive thought about yourself.
- Stop Comparing
A lot of our own judgements come from comparison to others. If we see others doing better than us, we judge ourselves for not being enough or for not achieving enough.
If this is stopped, self judgement won’t be an issue anymore. So, make it a habit to stop comparing yourself with others. Remember that comparing doesn’t bring anything constructive but only negative thoughts, feelings and judgements.
- Replace the negative with positive
If you really want to know how to stop judging yourself, you need to focus on the positive instead of the negative. The more you think negative about yourself, the more you believe it.
So, every time you have a negative or judgmental thought about yourself, make it a conscious habit to replace it with a positive one.
Focus on all that you have achieved and how far you have come. This will help you a great deal in keeping those self judgemental and depreciating thoughts at bay.
- Be grateful
Being grateful about the little things goes a long way in keeping you happy and motivated. The happier you are, the happier your thoughts are and this means lesser judgement. It is all about finding gratitude in the tiny things, even in everyday life.
Also, accept compliments with gratitude instead of saying something negative. This habit will go a long way in helping you stop self judgements.
- Love yourself entirely
While talking about how to stop judging yourself, it is important to talk about loving yourself. Love everything you are and even your imperfections completely.
Be kinder to yourself, forgive yourself more and give yourself all the love that you can.
Meditation can do a lot more for you than you may think. It can make you more self-aware, calmer, happier and help you find peace. You will also learn to live more in the present and be more mindful.
While all of these things may not seem directly connected, they go a long way in rooting your self judgemental thoughts from within.
Here was our practical guide on how to stop judging yourself. While all of these tips and tricks are guaranteed to work, they will only work for you if you make up your mind to do so. So, stay determined, confident, positive and you are sure to win against this battle of self-judgement.
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Mir is a British educated Digital Marketing Specialist with 8+years of experience in the industry. He is also a Growth Hacker of Kashmirica, a social impact brand that aims to take exclusives from Kashmir to the Global consumer.
An enthusiastic cultural entrepreneur, Mir is driven by a passion to bring about a social impact. He has a Masters in International Business from the University of Bedfordshire to his credit and has worked in leading Marketing positions at various SMEs and Startups for 8+ years.
Mir is an avid reader and loves writing about life, philosophy, marketing, entrepreneurship, and just about everything that he knows or researches.